9 Things You Can Do To Avoid Losing Your Identity While In A Relationship | Thought Catalog
Apr 10, Learn to love yourself and a man at the same time. single women to feel ashamed for not being in a place where you “love yourself.” if you're not strong enough, or working hard enough, to get there. Here are four practical tips for practicing self-love on a daily basis, while you are in a relationship. Oct 9, That had to be the basis of my life moving forward in a relationship. In order to stay connected to yourself, it's important to find a way to stay. You're stuck between a rock and a hard place and begin to wonder if you can maintain aspects of both yourself and your relationship while still being your own .
Your roots are in your family. Relying on my family was one of the best ways I recovered from losing myself in that relationship. They reminded me of the person I had always been, and they were there to pick me up when I fell. Of course, not every person is lucky enough to have positive family.
Is ‘finding yourself’ a legitimate reason for breaking up?
When you can, stay connected with those family members who will keep you grounded. Set up boundaries quickly. Lay down the rules of the relationship.
How much space do you need? What aspects of your life are off limits? What things are most important to you? If a partner wants to have a healthy relationship with you, he will want to have boundaries too. There needs to be boundaries so nobody consumes the other person. Partner with someone who likes you. You may think this seems painfully obvious, but is it?
We all have our quirks and our flaws and trust me, I know my list is long! Hold on to logical thinking. When love is involved, emotions get incredibly heightened. Those emotions are great and wonderful and special, but in no way should logic be allowed to step aside. We need to keep listening to our hearts and our minds. Find peace with the possibility of letting go. As much as we hate to think about it, not every relationship is a healthy one that should stick around for a lifetime.
Sometimes we must let go of a love not suited for us. You will probably cry and yell and binge on chocolate and feel devastated and depressed. And then you will survive — and then thrive. You have one precious life to live, and the clock is ticking. Do not waste one hour getting lost in the life of another. Making peace with the fact that you may need to split up takes confidence and guts.
But confidence and guts are the first step in finding yourself once again! Navigating through a romantic relationship can be tough, and there is no one-size-fits-all. We learn and we grow from our mistakes. Sometimes love requires sacrifice. But no matter what, you can never lose everything that makes you, well, YOU. Your lovely self must stay in tact.
Why You Can Be In A Relationship & Still Focus On Yourself - mindbodygreen
And remember the most important thing: I would come to depend on the partnership for satisfaction, happiness, validation, and self-worth.
My other half was often equally struggling. The result was that the positive energy in the space between us got drained. The more needy we both became the more toxic it got. We clung on because we thought we needed each other but we became resentful and started to hate the relationship. Neither of us was doing anything to nurture our love. We hung on until it got so bad that somebody snapped, and then it ended. The difference between then and now is self-love.
My partners had similar problems and inevitably my relationships would eventually turn sour. Now, after a lot of personal growth and self-actualization, with a partner who has also done the same, I can genuinely say that I love myself and I am glad to be me. Self-love means now that I also love my relationship. It seems like such a simple concept but it was a big epiphany when we both came to realize it in our recent conversation.
Often the insecurities will lead to conflict, and sometimes the conflict will lead to a breakup. A common piece of advice is that you have to learn to love yourself before you even get into a relationship. But what if you are already with someone?
9 Things You Can Do To Avoid Losing Your Identity While In A Relationship
Does it mean you have to part in order to do the work on yourself before finding love again? Do you have to meet some arbitrary self-love prerequisite before you qualify for a relationship? Of course it helps to be entering a relationship with a strong feeling of self-love.
But I also think that if you are in a partnership where self-love is lacking, and the space between you is needy, irritating, and harmful, things can be turned around.
Learning self-love is an ongoing process. Even couples who have a healthy amount of self-love could have more. Maintain a degree of space and independence. Keep your own rituals, your own activities, and your own friends.
Spend a healthy time apart doing your own thing to nurture your soul. Remember you are the master of your own happiness. Only you can do that. He or she can enhance the happiness that you nurture in yourself, but it is not their responsibility to make you happy.
How to Develop Self-Love & Strengthen Your Relationship
If you rely on them for happiness you will drain the space between you. Make sure you take the responsibility yourself. It starts with adopting a mindset that happiness is a choice, meaning you give yourself the power to cultivate happiness for yourself. Choosing happiness means accepting the truism that the only person you can change is you. Instead of looking to change others, you work on yourself and make sure you meet your own needs.
Another way to take responsibility for your own happiness is to choose to be present. If you wait for the perfect conditions before you allow yourself to be happy, then you will always be waiting. You quiet thoughts of the past or the future and decide to be happy in the moment.
Doing the little things that make you happy helps with this.