Dealing with Infertility When He Has the Issue
Oct 9, Infertility may cause stress not only individually, but to a marriage as well. So what can you do to help your marriage through infertility? counseling to help each partner to work through their unique perspectives and issues. Sep 17, Can your marriage survive the stress of infertility? trying to have a baby with a sperm or egg donor, infertility is usually a couple's problem. Oct 26, Has infertility ruined, or nearly ruined, your marriage? . would love to have their own biological children but can't because of fertility problems.
Communication makes a world of difference for couples facing infertility.
Counseling provides a time and safe space in which to communicate. Counselors are great at guiding couples through healthy communication skills.
Why Fertility Problems Can Wreck Your Relationship (and 4 Ways to Deal) - Health
For most anyone going through a stressful time, their rationality and patience often goes out-the-window. Working through infertility by finding a good counselor is one of the best gifts for strengthening a marriage.
A good counselor can be a foundational pillar of strength for couples facing infertility challenges. It may even be a good idea to get individual counseling to help each partner to work through their unique perspectives and issues.
Do an online search for therapists and counselors who specialize in infertility. Your doctor may even have someone they think is great and can set up a referral appointment for you. There is no shame in asking for help! Be completely honest about the current situation.
Be honest with yourself and your partner. Let your partner know exactly how you are feeling and what you are going through. Your partner needs to hear the truth to be able to support you the best way they know how. If honesty in a conversation hurts feelings, ask to take a break and come back to that conversation at a later time.
Never avoid the truth of your feelings and experiences! Take out the trash This means let go of all the negative thoughts and feelings surrounding the situation, your body, your partner, and life in general.
Negativity breeds negativity and resentment can drag a person down. Pent up negative thoughts and feelings may fester and make the situation worse! Resentment can be a ticking time bomb. No one is asking you to feel great each moment of the day, because yes, infertility may be stressful, but remember, where you are at is temporary. Hormones are raging and some of that may be due to medications.
Enhancing Your Relationship During Infertility
Take it day-by-day and do what you can to shift perspective to something uplifting. Force yourself to go for a walk, choose to see the beauty in each day. Have a stress management practice.
Say a positive affirmation when a negative thought comes to mind. Letting resentment go is a daily practice. Be compassionate with yourself and your partner. After all, they spend most of their lives trying not to get pregnant and assume that when they consciously start trying, pregnancy will soon be achieved.
As the months or even years go by without a baby, and efforts to achieve pregnancy are increased—from intrusive testing to high technology treatments—the path turns into the emotional roller-coaster of infertility. It can make a solid relationship stronger and weaken the core of a troubled one. Because infertility is a crisis, it is out of the realm of experience of most couples and thus challenges them to develop new strategies and coping mechanisms to deal with this life crisis. The good news is research has shown that, for most infertile couples, the experience strengthens their marriage by teaching them life-long skills to deal with problems.
Since infertility is one of many challenges couples may face in their life together, the skills learned can be adapted to use at other difficult times. Relationships, like anything you want to grow and thrive, have to be tended to flourish.
They are like a garden that must be carefully planted and then receive adequate amounts of nutrients such as sun, water, fertilizer, and cultivation to blossom. If the garden is neglected too long or receives too much of these nutrients, the plants will wither and die. It can cause you to neglect your relationship, focusing all energy on the baby quest.
In effect, infertility can create a life of its own in a marriage, causing you to lose sight of what brought you together in the first place and what is necessary for a healthy family to grow in the future. If you are an infertile couple, there are steps you can take to enhance your relationship so that it grows and thrives.
The following are some suggestions to help you along the way: Work as a team. Always approach the issues as a team, working together and finding ways to share responsibility regarding treatment. Avoid finger-pointing as nobody ever wins the blame game. Have regular dates where you can have fun and take a break from infertility.
Are there any underlying health issues that cause male infertility? Like women, men can have abnormal thyroid or prolactin hormone levels, which can lead to impaired reproductive function. Luckily, these problems can be treated medically and fertility is often restored. Toxins from chemotherapy or radiation therapy are another culprit of infertility; they can severely damage testicles. Esposito says that men often recover from this type of damage, but it may take a few years, and in some cases the damage is too severe.
To determine if an underlying health issue is the problem with your guy, his doctor will do a thorough medical history and can discuss additional issues that may be behind his infertility. How is male infertility diagnosed? Male infertility is usually diagnosed through a semen analysis, and for the most part, abnormalities are associated with the sperm. The sample will be tested for volume of ejaculation, sperm concentration, sperm motility how well sperm moveand sperm morphology the size and shape of the sperm.
What emotions might my guy experience as he goes through infertility treatments? He may be riding an emotional roller coaster, but depending on his communication style, he may not show it. Encourage your partner to open up to you or a professional counselor experienced in working with couples dealing with infertility.
Thus, if a man cannot impregnate his wife, is he really a man? You just haven't gotten your wife pregnant yet, in the way that you hoped it would happen. But the most virile man with a multimillion sperm count won't necessarily have a better chance of conceiving if there are complex fertility hurdles to overcome. How will his infertility affect our relationship? Infertility can affect even the strongest relationships.Coping With Infertility
Men often feel terribly guilty when they see how their wife is suffering because she's repeatedly not pregnant. In addition, a woman may be angry as well as guilty because she knows it's not her partner's fault. These feelings can cause each partner to withdraw from the other, both not wanting to hurt the other one by talking about their true feelings on the subject.
Couples need to be supportive of each other and find a doctor and a center that they feel provides needed support in an environment that is medically safe and reassuring.